Interview with Dr. Mike Rucker.
Author of "The Fun Habit"
Dr. Mike Rucker is
an organizational psychologist, behavioral scientist, and charter member of the
International Positive Psychology Association. He has been academically
published in publications like the International Journal of Workplace Health
Management. His ideas about fun and health have been featured in The Wall Street
Journal, Washington Post, Fast Company, Psychology Today, Forbes, Vox, Thrive
Global, Mindful, mindbodygreen, and more.
He currently serves as a senior leader at Active Wellness and is the author of
the best-selling book The Fun Habit, which is out now.
He answered some questions on his book for the Paris Book Festival.
---
1) What percentage of adults would you say are having fun at any given time?
While it's nearly impossible to pinpoint an exact percentage, I can confidently
assert that the number is not high enough. Most are familiar with the fact that,
as a nation, we here in the United States tend to be sleep-starved. We're waking
up to the fact that we're also fun-starved.
Delving into the context of leisure and time off, particularly in the United
States, we consistently rank bottom among industrialized nations in regard to
the amount of time off provided to employees. This is a critical indicator, as
time off is a fundamental prerequisite for leisure and fun. However, even when
given the opportunity for time off, it's reported that only about 50% of us make
use of it. This underutilization of PTO reflects a broader cultural trend where
a strong emphasis on productivity and work often overshadows the value of
leisure (and fun more broadly).
This data points to a deeper issue within our society, something I've coined 'a
fun deficit' (which comes with problems, just as a sleep deficit does). It
underscores the need to reevaluate our priorities and societal norms around work
and leisure. Encouraging a culture that values and promotes balance is not just
about creating more opportunities for fun, but it's fundamentally about
enhancing our overall well-being and quality of life.
2) If we did not have smartphones and social media, would we be having more
fun?
In The Fun Habit, I go into the psychological concept of valence, which refers
to the intrinsic attractiveness (positive valence) or averseness (negative
valence) of an event, activity, or situation. In the context of smartphones and
social media, valence becomes particularly relevant.
Smartphones and social media, in many ways, have become tools to displace
negative valence. For instance, feelings of boredom or frustration can be
temporarily alleviated through the use of these devices. They offer an easy
escape, a quick way to engage with something that feels immediately rewarding.
However, it's important to understand
that this displacement is often superficial (something I call The Nothing).
The time we spend scrolling through social media or engaging with our phones is
rarely looked back upon with fondness or a sense of meaningful satisfaction.
It's a distraction, rather than fulfilling.
If these digital distractions were absent, there's a compelling argument to be
made that we might engage more deeply with activities that have positive
valence—in other words, activities we find genuinely fun and rewarding. For
instance, without smartphones and social media, we might be more inclined to
seek direct, real-world experiences offering a deeper sense of enjoyment and
fulfillment. In moderation, both smartphones and social media have value, so
striking the right balance between digital and real-world engagement is
important.
3) Is fun something that can be experienced just in the moment, or is it
something that, upon reflection, manifests itself? In other words, do you have
to say, "Gee, that was fun" in order to gain the full measure?
Understanding the mindful component that makes fun so special is indeed
important. In this context, mindfulness refers to the ability to be fully
present and engaged in what we're doing, which is a key aspect of experiencing
fun. It's about immersing oneself in the here and now, relishing the experience
as it unfolds, which can amplify the pleasure derived from almost any enjoyable
activity.
However, the beauty of fun is that it isn't confined strictly to the present
moment. Fun, as an experience, can transcend time. When we reminisce about an
enjoyable past event, we are effectively re-experiencing that fun in the
present. This form of mental time travel not only allows us to relive
pleasurable moments, but can also provide a sense of continuity and connection
to our past selves. It's a powerful tool for sustaining happiness and
reinforcing positive memories. That's why there's a whole chapter about it in
The Fun Habit.
Then, there's the concept of Type II fun, which is particularly intriguing. This
type of fun might not be immediately apparent or enjoyable in the traditional
sense (while we're experiencing it). Activities that are challenging, demanding,
or even uncomfortable can fall into this category. Yet, upon reflection, these
experiences often bring a profound sense of satisfaction, accomplishment, and
joy. They remind us that fun isn't always about instant gratification; it can
also be about the fulfillment that comes from overcoming challenges and pushing
our limits.
4) If we go to an event and I had fun but my guest did not, can we say that
the event was fun? Or is it only fun if we both are on the same page?
Your question highlights the subjective nature of fun. In our personal lives,
the answer is relatively straightforward. If you attended an event and found it
enjoyable, then for you, the event was fun. Your guest, who did not enjoy it,
would naturally disagree. Fun is a deeply personal and subjective experience,
shaped by individual preferences, interests, and expectations. What one person
finds exhilarating, another might find dull or even
unpleasant. This diversity in experiences is a natural part of human
individuality and part of what makes fun so special.
However, the dynamics change when we shift this scenario to a work environment
or to a group setting. In these settings, the goal often shifts towards creating
experiences that are collectively enjoyable and inclusive. The challenge here is
to find a balance that caters to the diverse tastes and preferences of all
participants. If a significant portion of the group isn't having fun, it might
indicate a need to reassess and adapt your approach to ensure inclusivity and
broader appeal.
5) How does fun change? I know many pro athletes, and others claim that they
learn that what they used to consider fun is really a business.
The evolution of fun (especially when it concerns professional athletes and
individuals who turn their passion into a career) is a multifaceted topic. I
learned a lot about some of the nuances here from my mentor, Dr. Michael Gervais.
Admittedly, he would be better at answering this question.
What I can say is that when someone begins an activity, like a sport, purely for
the love and enjoyment of it, it embodies the essence of fun in its most
unadulterated form. However, as this activity transforms into a profession or a
business, the nature of that fun can change significantly.
For many athletes and (professionals in similar fields), what starts as a fun,
passionate endeavor often evolves into something more complex. The introduction
of elements like competition, financial incentives, fame, and the pressure to
perform can alter the initial experience of fun. The activity that was once a
source of pure joy can become a source of stress or obligation. It's a
transition from playing for the love of the game to playing for the stakes of
the game.
However, this change in the nature of fun isn't necessarily negative. It can be
seen as an evolution or maturation of the activity and the individual's
relationship with it. For some, the competitive, high-stakes nature of
professional sports (or any career developed from a passion) can bring a
different kind of satisfaction and fulfillment—one that is more aligned with
personal growth, achievement, and the thrill of overcoming challenges.
More broadly, it's also important to recognize that fun is not a static concept;
it evolves as we grow and our life circumstances change. What we find fun at one
stage of our life may differ significantly from what brings us joy at another.
This evolution is a natural part of life and is influenced by a myriad of
factors, including our changing physical abilities, interests, responsibilities,
and the shifting contexts of our lives.
6) Do men and women have different concepts of fun?
Absolutely! The concept of fun is as diverse as the individuals experiencing it,
and this extends to differences between men and women as well. Each person,
regardless of gender, has unique preferences, interests, and ways of
experiencing joy. What one person finds exhilarating, another might not find
appealing at all.
This variety in what we consider fun adds to the richness and diversity of the
human experience. It allows for a wide range of activities, hobbies, and
pursuits that people can enjoy. It's important to embrace and celebrate these
differences, as they make our interactions more interesting and enrich our
understanding of each other.
In essence, the differing concepts of fun among men, women, and (indeed) all
people highlight the personalized nature of enjoyment and pleasure. It's a
reminder that there's no one-size-fits-all definition of fun, and that's what
makes fun so exciting and interesting.
7) How do your theories on fun relate to such theorists as Dr. Norman Vincent
Peale and Tony Robbins?
My theories on fun do intersect with some of the principles highlighted by
thinkers like Dr. Norman Vincent Peale and Tony Robbins (as well as many
others), though these two each have their unique perspectives. Both Peale, known
for his work on the power of positive thinking, and Robbins, with his focus on
personal development and peak performance, emphasize the importance of mindset
in achieving a fulfilling life.
Where my work does align is in the acknowledgment that people's attitudes and
perceptions play a crucial role in how we experience and engage with the world,
including our experiences of fun and enjoyment. While my focus is more
specifically on the role and value of fun in our lives, there is a shared
understanding across our theories that a positive and proactive approach to life
can lead to greater happiness and fulfillment.
However, it's also important to appreciate each approach's distinct nuances and
applications. My work specifically explores the intricacies of fun as a vital
component of well-being, offering practical strategies to incorporate it into
daily life. This is somewhat different from the broader motivational or
self-help frameworks proposed by Peale and Robbins.
8) Did you have fun writing the book?
Despite some challenges along the way, I had a lot of fun writing the book. One
significant obstacle was dealing with an illness due to complications from an
early COVID-19 infection (during the rewrite of the initial manuscript).
However, benefitting from the advice I generally share with others, the process
of writing the book remained enjoyable and rewarding. It also reinforced for me
the idea that fun isn't solely dependent on external circumstances, but can also
be a matter of perspective and approach.
Being deliberate about our choices—like who we collaborate with, the activities
we engage in, and the environments we choose to operate in at any given time—can
significantly increase the enjoyment of any endeavor. In writing The Fun
Habit, I intentionally selected my collaborator, Sara Grace, because it was
enjoyable to work with her. Working with Sara was a delightful experience that
greatly contributed to the fun of the writing process (despite the health
challenges I faced during that time).
This underscores a key theme of my work: fun can be found and amplified in many
situations when approached with intentionality and a positive mindset. Even in
the face of adversity or difficulty, the way we choose to engage with our
activities can define our experience of fun.
9) What are you like at parties?
Ha! Great question. At parties, my demeanor really depends on the setting and
the people around me. I have to admit, I can be a bit socially awkward at times.
In gatherings where I'm surrounded by friends and familiar faces—"my people," so
to speak—I tend to loosen up and have a great time. There's a comfort and ease
in being with those who know me well, which makes for a more enjoyable and
relaxed experience.
However, in more formal settings, I often find myself feeling out of my element.
These situations can feel like 'forced fun' to me, where the socializing doesn't
come as naturally. Despite this, I do make an effort to engage and connect with
others, understanding the importance of getting out of my comfort zone when
necessary, while also recognizing and respecting my own limits.
10) If you were the Daddy in the Beach Boys song "Fun, Fun, Fun," would you
have taken her T-bird away?
Another great question! And I'm not entirely sure how to respond. On the
broader topic of family and fun, however, your question aligns with questions
I've encountered recently as a guest on several parenting podcasts: how to be a
fun parent and still maintain a level of discipline. To that, I say the focus
should be on incorporating fun that works for your respective family dynamics.
While there isn't a one-size-fits-all approach to parenting, research
consistently supports the idea that families that engage in fun activities
together tend to have stronger bonds and thrive.
The key is to find a balance between discipline and fun. It's about creating an
environment where mutual respect, understanding, and joy coexist. This sometimes
means making tough decisions for the family's greater good while still ensuring
ample room for shared experiences of fun and leisure.
In the context of the Beach Boys' song, while the decision to take away the
T-bird might seem harsh, it's a reminder that fun should be balanced with
responsibility and kindness. So, although I don't have a good answer for your
specific question, I will say a
worthy goal in any family is fostering a loving, supportive atmosphere where fun
remains a key component of the family's collective experience (while respect for
rules, and respect for one another, coexists in a supportive manner).